Friday, January 28, 2011

How many lines do we walk?

So, after some rather deep conversation something struck a bit of a chord within me. The discussion was about the differences between Truth, Brutal Honesty, and Downright Rudeness.

It became immediately apparent that the lines that separate these three things are not only thin, but very grey. It ends up being more dependant on the person on the receiving end; that is to say how easily upset they are and how apt they are to letting someone hurt their feelings.

Each person has thier own perception of what is truth, what is brutal honesty, and what is rude.

The issue, is that not everyone's perception of these is the same......so who's perception is the right one? Is anyone's?

So after sleeping and thinking about this some more, I find myself wondering just how many other situations this applies to. How many lines are we each walking on a daily basis? hourly? every minute? every second?

I find myself wanting to ask people what they consider the difference to be between truth, brutal honesty, and rudeness now that this topic has come up....and maybe after that, I'll find some other "lines" to poll about.

Sometimes I really just think as a society we have all grown too "soft"....that we have all come to a point where we are so concerned with all the opinions besides our own that what other people think is capable of hurting our feelings so easily. We have evloved into a "bleeding heart society" and now governments, agencys, committees, etc. all create "rules" and "regulations" and "standards" to "protect" everyone's feelings. We are censored; forced to comform.....to be "politically correct".

It is rediculous......what happened to being able to be yourself? If I hurt someone's feelings....who's fault is it?

Is it my fault for saying it? Is it yours for caring what I think?

What if someone asks me a question, and at the end of the question says 'be honest'.....and I say something honest, but it is inherently a put-down? Am I at fault if I hurt their feelings? or can they value my honesty and accept it? afterall, they asked for my honesty right?

So what about you? Do you live your life expecting everyone to have something nice to say all the time? Do you like everything to come with a grain of salt, or a grain of sugar? Maybe there is no right answer, maybe it all depends on context....but what then, can be standardized?

There-in lies the beauty of human interaction.

2 comments:

  1. I really liked this because:
    a) You're thinking about this deeper and that is a good sign of change. A good one in my opinion

    b) I like that I understand your blogs inmediately...they are what they are.

    And to respond to what I think about this entry; I think we all know deep down that someone will always have something hurtful to say, we all know that for a fact but we ain't prepared for it most of the times, and less prepared for it to come from someone we love dearly or just someone we never thought would say something like that. I think society isn't soft though, I think nowadays it tells you to be what you are, embrace it, whatever that is, and be happy with it, and that is a little selfish in my opinion. It doesn't tell you there's a line you can't cross, where being yourself can actually hurt other people, it tells you to just BE YOURSELF no matter what, no matter who... And that shouldn't be that way, since my rights end when other people's begin. I would say, always be honest, always tell the truth, never compromise your honor or virtues for nothing, but first of all, first and before anything, love who you have in front, for no reason at all, but because he or she is a human, and they are asking for something that is important to them, they expect the worse out of you, when they ask for the truth, but in some part of them that will never be outspoken they are also asking for a bit of mercy, to not break something while you say what you need to say.

    Love Nick, a little bit of caring opens a lot of doors and a lot of hearts like I told you :)... and I always tell this to my friends: "you better hear it from me, than anyone else". cause other's won't think about feelings when they tell you what you truly need to hear, but I will try to tell you that thing exactly, but in ways you complete the sentences in your mind, save me the words, and have you against the mirror feeling more like im glad i have someone here with me facing this, than "and this is so embarrasing..and painful"..

    Today is a better day than yesterday though, bitter lines I wrote last night, today Im feeling good! enjoy the day!

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  2. Extremely well put Gaby, and I enjoyed hearing your viewpoint!

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