"Talking" and "Conversation"

For some reason lately I have been quite inspired to think about conventional society and the way people interact. I noticed something....that there is quite a huge difference between "talking" and having a conversation. Ever notice when you want to get to know someone, you almost 100% of the time are stuck in "small talk" and trivial jargon? Why is it so hard to just cut through all the bullshit and talk about REAL stuff?

"how was your day?"
"did you enjoy the nice weather we had the other day?"
"what's your favorite color?"

These questions are pretty unfascinating and don't tell you anything about the person answering them. So, why is it so "wierd" and difficult to get right to the questions you REALLY want answered? How do you make that transition? I recently noticed rather out of the blue that I FAR more enjoy talking to someone that is willing to ask questions beyond the standard trivial small talk. I like when my thoughts are challenged, when I can discuss the way I think about something and hear someone else's analysis. It made me wonder how and when the transition takes place when you meet someone....

How long before someone is comfortable enough to ask a REAL question? What are the chances the other person actually answers honestly, if at all? How do you know where someone's limit is as far as their comfort level of things to discuss?

Actually, I am just now remembering a situation I experienced while attending college. A complete stranger came up to me while I was sitting on a bench outside reading/studying and asked if I had a few minutes. He immediately asked me what religion I was, what my thoughts on God were, and what extend of a higher power I beleive in. Looking back, I had felt EXTREMELY akward about this conversation...but I did answer all of his questions honestly, and we had a little debate for maybe 5-10 mins. I feel bad now because I was so wierded out at the time, but this person gave me probably the most meaningful conversation I had all week at the time.

I think now that I have realized that's the type of exchange I prefer with someone, I somewhat wish I could go back and re-do that conversation a bit. Maybe even thank him for the debate and at least get his name. Nonetheless, I can't help but think that if I were to approach someone in a similar fashion they might be wierded out just as I was, regardless of topic. What makes people this way? Are we all this way? Born this way? Maybe we get raised and conditioned this way.

Methinks it's time to try being more direct with conversations and see how people react. Ask some crazy off-the-wall questions and see what happens.

I'll report back how it goes after a few tries haha