Pre-Occupied

Well, I haven't had or made the time to get back on here to put my thoughts down in a while and figured it's about time to stop back.

For the past few weeks, I have had my head clouded with heavy thoughts. Mostly related to one underlying issue. I generally try to be a pretty optimistic guy, but its just this one rather big problem that continues to irk me. I finished my Bachelor's of Science in Architecture degree in December of 2008, and promptly found myself laid off from the firm I had been working for just 4 days later. I immediately began searching for another firm to work for, even with help from my boss that laid me off calling in a good word for me with some of his friendly competitors. After 6 months of trying, I gave up and started searching for ANY job I could get to support myself. This landed me at a local RV dealership as a parts and accessories clerk. It is now February of 2010 and I still find myself stuck working at this miserable establishment and loathe getting out of bed to come to work everyday. I have continued to farm out resumes and even re-apply to firms that had said no back in 2009, still with no sign of light at the end of the tunnel. I've considered going back to school, but due to it being so long ago that I finished, I have no material to submit a portfolio for acceptance into a graduate architecture program.

The part of my situation that really grinds my gears, is that a simple deviation of 2-3yrs would have netted me FAR different results. My generation very honestly has gotten the short end of the stick thanks to the economy crash. If I was 2-3 yrs younger and went the same route, I would just now be finishing up my bachelor's and be able to go straight into the graduate program. I wish that were the case, as seeing the economy still not promising anything, it would buy me another 2 yrs before having to search seriously for a career position.
If I were 2-3 years older, I would have already had at least 1.5yrs experience in the field before the economy collapsed, and therefore have more to work with in applying for other jobs, or at the very least be that much closer to being licensed and able to practice on my own.

As I stated I have done my best not to dwell on this, but it has been 14 months and I have not done a single thing related to a degree I put so much effort into. I had hopes of being in a financially stable position at this point where I could be looking at owning a home for myself and start getting serious about life, but instead I moved back with my parents and live basically paycheck to paycheck with no real ability to create or build a savings. It seems my options are greatly limited now, and I really do not want to be at this RV job any longer. It seems I either must go to a different school for some specialized training in an applicable area to my field, or go back and repeat some of my classes to freshen up on skills, and then possibly take the higher levels of those courses for more experience or to keep up on the skills to stay on the ball until I find something.

I hate that this is so heavy on my mind, but I find it hard to deviate from constantly thinking about what the hell I can do about it, and it has caused close friends and family to notice a difference in my dimeanor. It would just be nice to have a normal 9-5 professional job so that I can enjoy weekends off to socialize with friends, instead I work some strange hours that always change week to week and have to work weekends.

Well, there isn't much I can do, and I know I'm not alone in this situation. I guess all I can do is try to keep myself occupied with my hobbies. So hopefully this summer nets me a new job, or at least maybe I can get a good start on my "locost" caterham/seven roadster kitcar project, and put some miles on my 1975 cafe racer CB550.......

Cheers 'til next time

Starting off on the right foot

Well, it's officially 2010 now and I suppose that means it is time to reflect on the past year, and set some goals for the year to come. I feel like I made a lot of good decisions for myself in 2009 yet have many more to make for 2010. I got myself out of a couple seriously bad situations and into some temporary comfortable ones, but now it's time to start taking chances and moving forward again. I have set some goals for myself for the year....I say goals because "New Year's Resolutions" rarely are kept up on, so I won't really even entertain that whole idea. I have pretty much decided that it is time I kick my life into high gear and get moving. It's time to put some serious effort into getting my career started and begin building the foundation for what is to be the rest of my life. I have decided that if I do not get something going by the time summer is here, I will have to start applying to grad schools to get my masters in architecture as it will really be the only option I will have left to re-sharpen my skills and buy myself some time for the economy and job market to rebound.

On top of this new found motivation for getting my life going, I have also realized that I need to do some things for myself while I can and while I'm still young. I'm in the process of booking a trip to Europe this summer, I plan on building a car from scratch, putting some serious miles on the motorcycle, skydiving in July, keep riding motocross more seriously, and keep my friends close. I don't want to get so caught up in the rat race that I forget to experience life and end up looking back wishing I did these things that I have always wanted to do.

over the past 5 weeks or so I have been spending quite a bit of time with someone I met, and decided on new years eve that it was time I take a step forward with that as well. I haven't been serious with anyone since what happened last march and I finally met someone I feel is worth my time. So as of January 1st 2010 I now have introduced Jill into the mix, and feel pretty good about that. I have good feelings about this coming year, I feel like there are many good things to come and experiences that I'll be writing about.

Intro

I suppose the time has come for me to create a place for me to collect my personal thoughts and aspirations. I consider myself a rather normal and average guy, with a hobby issue. Although average, I have a great deal of interests that I occupy my time with. I dable in many different things, I am not particularly fantastic nor a failure at anything. I seem to have an addiction to hobbies, rather than a particular hobby in general. I constantly find myself wanting to learn or do new things, but never master anything completely. I am a guitar player, a skateboarder, automotive enthusiast, artist, motorcyclist, motocross racer, business man, architect, conversationalist, music enthusiast.......and the list goes on.

I'll try to sum myself up in a few key sentances, and elaborate in following posts on myself and my experiences.

I base my life on the notion that "Everything happens for a reason". This simple idea is what helps me rationalize and stay positive in the most negative of situations. I manage to stay a relatively happy individual even though I am completely discontent with where my life currently stands. Its been quite a rolleroaster ride of a journey, but without the ups and downs where is the fun right? I work a job I hate to sustain myself until I get back into my field. I have completed a Bachelor's degree in architecture, and have since been layed off from the firm I had been interning at....and coincidently now work at a dealership parts department. This is something that bothers me but I guess it's all part of the process. With the country in the economic state we are in I know I'm not alone in my situation. After spending six months searching for another architecture position locally, I took what I could get and have since expanded my search to country-wide, still to no avail as of yet.

I am a truly dedicated friend, to those who are deserving. I do not consider myself to have MANY friends, as I prefer to have ones so close they are more like family. I do not believe in the kind of friend you only spend time with occasionally and don't know anything "real" about them. Those are "aquaintances" in my opinion and hold a different value. I beleive in quality over quantity. My true friends would go to the ends of the earth for me and I would do the same for them. It's these people that are most influential in my life.

I have been through more hardships than most other people my age, and those situations have hardened me. I am the type of person to do a lot for others, and sometimes get nothing in return, and sometimes even pretty heavy negative effects due to it. I have some crazy stories to tell, maybe I can write them out later.

To leave off, I'll describe the present.

I have moved back with my parents to get on my feet, and began rebuilding my life and relationships that had suffered in a period of time where I went through some difficulties. I have thankfully been able to revive a lot of my "old self" while improving on other things, and recently have finally found myself coming back into my own. I am finally comfortable taking some risks again and putting myself out there in various situations, and I'm ready to trust again.